


Night of Wedding Jitters

by soonhoonotes



Series: I got bored and thought of Soonhoon [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Acceptance, Angst, Cigarettes, Goodbyes, M/M, Marriage, Mentioned Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups, Romance, Slice of Life, Wedding Night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:47:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27524833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soonhoonotes/pseuds/soonhoonotes
Summary: Kwon Soonyoung is getting married to Jeon Wonwoo tomorrow but he just can't shrug off his midnight thoughts.
Relationships: Jeon Wonwoo/Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi, Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Jihoon | Woozi
Series: I got bored and thought of Soonhoon [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2011738
Comments: 8
Kudos: 30





	Night of Wedding Jitters

**Author's Note:**

> Music Recommendation: Die For You - The Weeknd.

  
It's already 1am in the morning, Soonyoung should be sleeping right now as he is getting married tomorrow. Wedding jitters? Maybe. Yeah, maybe it's that. He has been shuffling on his bed for hours now, but he can't seem to fall in to a deep slumber. 

He decided to sit straight in his bed and think of ways how to sleep. Should he count sheeps? Should he work out? He's been looking around his room when he noticed a pack of cigarette settled on his working desk. 

Without second thoughts, he stood up and reached for it. As soon as he got the pack, he started walking towards the door, reaching for his coat, and left his bedroom. 

"Where are you going?" Jeonghan asked as he noticed his co housemate, planning to leave the apartment. Jeonghan is holding a cake tray and a pack of flour, probably because he's assigned to work for the wedding cake tomorrow.

"Going out for a walk. " Soonyoung partly smiled wanting to leave so that he can come back earlier. 

"Going to the park?" Jeonghan asked, concerned for his housemate because he doesn't even know what goes within Soonyoung's head.

"Don't worry. I'll be fine. I just can't sleep." Jeonghan nodded as if he understood what Soonyoung said. He tapped his friend's shoulder and said "Be back after an hour, okay? Your groom to be will be so mad to me if he knew I let you go out in the middle of the night. " 

"Yeah, Wonwoo can be really whiny sometimes" Soonyoung let out a chuckle at the thought of his groom's protective personality. 

"Wonwoo is really an angel." Jeonghan expressed his realization about how he likes Wonwoo for Soonyoung.

"He really is." Soonyoung muttered, looking down on his clothes while holding up the ties of his hoodie. 

"I'm glad he makes you happy. I can see your real smile because of him, and it's not like because I want to see you fulfilled like asking for your happiness became a mission and you're tasked to do it. It's because i'm glad you're really happy right now and you should know that." Soonyoung tilted his head and looked straight to Jeonghan, relieved with what he said.

"You think so?" Jeonghan nodded and gave him an assuring smile. "Come here." 

Soonyoung leaned forward and Jeonghan reached out for a hug. The hug lasted for seconds, as Jeonghan pulled away from it and playfully disheveled his hair. Soonyoung hissed only to receive a laugh from his roommate.

  
"Now, go. I don't want a frustrated Wonwoo calling me continuously. I love him but he can be annoying sometimes." Soonyoung laughed and waved at Jeonghan assuring him that he will back early.

He started putting his shoes and reached for the knob. Soonyoung started to feel the breeze of the midnight air once he opened the door. Immediately, he started walking to the front gate. 

Tomorrow's the big day. He'll be wedded to Wonwoo. 

He met Wonwoo when he was lost. He never thought that someone like Wonwoo can make him change for the better. That someone can lift him up through the dark days. Often, people don't like the thought of them having a relationship with someone who has a lot of issues in his life because they think that love is ideal. Love is not fixing someone's issue as if it's his own. 

Wonwoo isn't like that. Wonwoo became Soonyoung's lamp through the darkness and it's not Wonwoo who fixed everything for him, he just became the reason why he wanted to be fixed and tomorrow, he is marrying him. 

A lot of thoughts pressured him as he walks towards the park, kicking every rock that he'll encounter, stepping unto every dried leaves he'll see. Tomorrow, he'll be a husband. Someone who'll be having a person for the rest of his life. Anxiety may have been really the reason but he knows it's not just that.

When he reached the park, he sat on the bench and feel the warmth of silence covering the area. He reached for the pack of cigarette he kept in his pocket and light it up. He was about to blow a smoke when someone talked. 

"You are smoking again?" Soonyoung shifted his gaze and see him, Lee Jihoon.

He rested his arms down taking away the lighted cigarette from him. 

"It's been months since I last smoked." looking down, his eyes on the cigarette.

"Wonwoo's going to be really mad." Jihoon chuckled sitting down beside him. Soonyoung laughed with him.

"He's like you." He sit back, dropping his cigarettes and crushed it unto his shoes to remove the fire being emitted from it. Never feeling any puff from it. Jihoon furrowed his eyebrows, wondering why Soonyoung didn't continue to smoke in front of him.

"Why did you stop?" Jihoon smiled as he asked.

"You'll be mad." putting his hands in his pockets and crossed his legs. 

"You know i'll never be mad at you, even when you always sneak out at the rooftop whenever i'm asleep" Soonyoung laughed. Jihoon looked amused that Soonyoung is laughing by what he said.

"Is it amusing for you, huh? That I never really get mad at you?" Soonyoung took long before he responded.

"Even when i'm marrying Wonwoo?" silence filled the gap between them. Jihoon sighed.

"I can never be mad at you..... for marrying Wonwoo." Jihoon gave him a quivery smile, gulping air because it's too intoxicating to breathe. 

"Why not?" Soonyoung doesn't wanna hear what he has to say. Of all people, he hates it when it's Jihoon who has to tell him what to do. 

"Because I want you to be happy, because he... he makes you happy" his voice cracks while muttering the words. Jihoon holds Soonyoung's hand, playing his thumbs on the back of his palm.

Soonyoung's lost in words, his tears are starting to well up, looking at how Jihoon held his hand. 

"I really hate it when it's you who has the final say on everything that I do. I really hate it when I can't decline anything that you have to wish. You had me wrapped around you." Soonyoung looked at Jihoon. " I hate it that I still love you even after you left me." Soonyoung cannot contain his emotions, and let out an uncontrollable sob in front of Jihoon.

"I hate seeing you cry, Soons." Jihoon placed his hands on Soonyoung's face, thumb reaching under his eyes to wipe off the tears. Soonyoung held Jihoon's hand that is resting on his cheeks and closed his eyes. He doesn't feel anything but coldness by the way Jihoon is holding him, maybe it's because it's 1 in the morning. 

"I've been trying so hard.... so hard to forget you." Soonyoung's eyes were prickled with tears, keeping up with deep breaths because he is so done with crying, he just wants the pain to stop. His hands gripped unto Jihoon's hand, shaking. 

"You don't have to forget me...." Jihoon whisphered, lips shaking " but you can live without me..."

"Ji, do you want me to marry Wonwoo?" eyes never leaving Jihoon's sight. Jihoon's smile softened and reached for Soonyoung's and pressed his lips on his forehead. Soonyoung closed his eyes, feeling warmth finally. 

"If Wonwoo makes you feel alive, you deserve to walk down that aisle, put the ring on his finger, and promise him forever." 

"It's you who I want to promise forever with.." never leaving the eye contact to him. 

"You already promised me that before. It's my turn to promise you now..... i'll always be by your side even when you're married, which is tomorrow "Soonyoung chuckled." when you have kids, I'll be here. Did you forget? I'm also your bestfriend. I can even protect your kids. " Jihoon fixed Soonyoung's bangs. 

  
"I have one last thing to ask Soonyoung." Jihoon held Soonyoung's hands. Soonyoung gave him a yearning look. "Before that, I want you to close your eyes." Soonyoung nodded and started to close his eyes. 

"Promise me. Promise me, you'll always be happy." Soonyoung nods. "I'll always be happy." Jihoon smiled.

"Promise me you'll love Wonwoo." Soonyoung nods. " I do love him, you know that." 

  
"Hmm yeah. Fair enough. Now, promise me that you'll take care of Wonwoo" Soonyoung nods, chin starts to tremble. It took a long pause before Jihoon responded again.

"Kwon Soonyoung, promise me you'll live.. _**Baby, live for me.**_ " Soonyoung taking long, deep breaths, nodding slightly.

"I will always... always love you, Kwon."

"I'll always love you too." 

Silence.

Soonyoung slowly opened his eyes pulling back slightly. He sighed with grim twist on his mouth and stood up, turning away from the bench and started walking. As he was walking, he threw the pack of cigarette he brought in the nearest trashcan.

Once he did, he looked back to the bench where he sat, now empty. 

**_"Goodbye Lee Jihoon."_ **

\--

_As soon as Soonyoung left, Jeonghan's phone ring from the dining table. He immediately retrieved it and answered._

_"Seungcheol, i'm busy Soonyoung's cak-"_

_"Is he there?" Jeonghan looked to see who the caller is and realized that it's not Seungcheol._

_"He just left." he deeply sighed._

_"Why? Where is he going? Is he....... is he having second thoughts?" the caller asked, being naturally uneasy with what Jeonghan said._

_"I don't think so, Won." Jeonghan assured him. He leaned on the dining table, starting to play with his nails._

_" Why.. why not?"_

_"I think..." Jeonghan looked at the door where Soonyoung left._

  
_"I think... I think he's just finally saying goodbye."_

**Author's Note:**

> To clear up: 
> 
> \- Yes, I never exactly put it up but yeah Jihoon is a de4d character here.   
> \- Wonwoo helped him get through his lover's death  
> \- I don't know how to put it up but the plot is Jihoon d!ed because of their recklessness as youth (I'll live it to your imagination on how he d!ed, they are basically married but not with wedding shts and formal marriage certificates. They just vowed with rings so yeah not legally married that explains the "you already promised me part"   
> \- The cigarettes is um somehow has a deep meaning for me, I don't know if you got it. Jihoon doesn't like him taking cigarettes but doesn't ask him to stop unlike Wonwoo who doesn't like it so he asks him to stop. Basically, the act of throwing the cigarette is like an invocation that he's ready to start a new life with Wonwoo, idk how to convey it. 
> 
> That's all. I'm still working on the technical aspects of writing 'cause I feel like my ideas are there I just don't know how to write it with emotions HAHAHAHAHHA. 
> 
> CIAO.


End file.
